Friendship

This past Sunday my best friend of over twenty years got married to a beautiful girl named Tori.   They had it out at the lake and, despite the incredibly hot weather, the wedding was a beautiful celebration of two people who love each other very much.  I watched as a man who I often saw as the more light-hearted and fancy-free of the two of us, make a serious commitment that will immediately and permanently alter his life.  And, through it all I found myself reminiscing about the years that preceded this day in Randy's friendship with me.

I think the reminiscing started about a week out from the wedding when I started to write my speech that all best men must do as part of the honor of that title being bestowed upon them.  I started thinking back to all the fun times that Randy and I had.  There were certain summers where I couldn't go a day without Randy being at my door asking me to come out and play football with him and his sisters.  Or, asking me to go down to Kennedy Elementary School (our elementary alma mater) or to just go down to the pool.  (Looking back, it is a wonder that he and I didn't contract some horrible disease like malaria or tetanus due to the horrible upkeep of that pool.)  I remembered watching movie after movie with Randy.  One of my fondest movie memories was when he and I first saw Twister together.  We came out of that theater PUMPED!  It was by far and away the most thrill-packed movie either of us had ever seen in a theater.  Another is Happy Gilmore...  And how we watched it around twenty times in one summer (if not more.)

But, what really struck me about the memories I gathered about Randy, were the impact that he had on the most serious, grave and influential moments of my life.  Quite often, my decisions were a collaborative affair between myself, him and God.  I consulted Randy on many big decisions.  I like to think he did the same.  When I started dating my first REAL girlfriend right out of high school, he was there to give advice and, frankly, to calm me down when it came time to grant my first kiss.  He was also there when it became evident that she wasn't the one for me, and stayed nearby to make sure that I was going to be fine without her.  Of course, that greatly pales in comparison to his solidity during the really trying times in my life.  He was there when my grandma died.  He was there when my grandpa died.  He stayed close when my mom had a massive heart attack.  And, when I found a girl that I truly loved, he gave sound advice each step of the way.  And, when my heart was broken and I had no idea what my purpose was...  He reminded me that my purpose was greater and had more depth than loving one girl.  No matter how amazing that one girl was.

Randy defined and redefined what friendship was to me.  When I needed someone to slap me upside the head and tell me that I was being an idiot, he was there.  When I needed someone to remind me of my purpose, he was there.  When I needed someone to celebrate with when things were amazing, he was there.  And, when I needed a shoulder to cry on, he was almost always the first shoulder to come to my aid.

What is even more incredible is that Randy is not alone in the great friends I have had in my life.  I have had a string of friends who I know would gladly give their lives (metaphorically and literally) for mine.  And, I know that there are a string of friends who I would have done the same for.  Randy is simply the shining example because he has been that friend for the longest in my life.  I feel so incredibly fortunate to have had so many friends who have come along side me (both in the past and even still) and encouraged me and loved me.  And, I feel blessed to have had so many friends for whom I could return the favor.  I would begin to list all of you, but, inevitably, I would leave one or two out and then I'd be in trouble.  But, they know who they are.  And, I definitely know who they are.

I guess all I can say to wrap up this post is to say this:  If you have a friend who you know would give their life for you or if you have a friend who unconditionally loves you despite your most hurtful flaws...  I encourage you to let them know that.  Let them know and thank them by being the friend to them that they have been to you all along.

Friendship is one of those gifts that is invaluable.  It is also one that you aren't guaranteed to be given...  At all or at the same level you have come to enjoy.  That is why it is so important to let those friends know you love them often.  Friends come and friends also go.  And, that is the way life is set up.  But, legacies live on, even after the friends have moved on.  Make sure that you leave a legacy for your friends to remember when you've moved away, moved on to the next step in your life or passed away.  By doing so, you live on in their hearts and memories forever.

--Danny